Worship
There is one stance democrats and republicans could agree on to conform, I believe, that is, electoral reform.
We must do something about these panzies’ egos and itchy fingers and green libidos.
Here is what I propose, a semantic slight of hand.
Let us change the word “President” to “Pharaoh”;
“Congressman” to “disciple” or “priest” or “shaman”.
And let them never be re-elected, but rather die in their position with no outlet for escape in retirement.
Let them truly prove their worth! And let us truly saturate our mistaken judgements!
I’m tired of ‘so and so promised this but then changed, like, he’s so different now!’
wah wah.
put your conviction where your scripture is, and let’s call Obama our Pharaoh-God.
Can you picture it?
Stimulate the economy, turn Oklahoma into a statue.
Use the homeless if you have to.
I want to see Obama with a sword in his hand.
I want to see Henry Paulson’s head on the Washington Monument.
Joe Biden with a crazy eye, bulging temples, wondering where the Hell Mitt Romney went.
I’m so sick of my fellow One Mind constituents not admitting the obvious.
The television is our church.
Let’s bow down collectively to C-Span.
Shag carpets, old potato chip crumbs, Dad’s cigarette smoke.
“The Pharaoh is willing His Nasa legion to send men and women to the Andromeda Galaxy…”
Here, here!
Amen.
The rich need more money! The poor need more money! The system needs to work!
This way! That way!
By God if we’re going to be hypnotized let’s do it right!
Let us gaze into the emerald scepter of our Pharaoh, let us chant His praises. Let us channel all the Gods of the Human Spirit through him.
Praise Allah! Praise Jehovah! Praise Christ! Praise God and Abraham! Muhammed! Praise be the Pharaoh who carries the sovereign will of the One Mind!
I simply can’t believe people can believe so wholeheartedly in the difference between them.
Honestly, we are all God. This is simple ass shit.
The world needs to run. Humans need to turn. This different countries with borders and diametrically opposed political parties stuff is not working. The human spirit is in fucking danger.
Oh Lord just give me a pharaoh.
And I swear I’ll never doubt myself again.